The Moira/Max Conundrum

Ok, I've always been a fan of the show The L Word, and was delighted at the start of Season 3 at the prospect of having Moira/Max come on the show. I figured, yeah, some publicity about the plight of us non-lesbian-identified lovers of women would be great especially if it helps the Gay and Lesbian community understand transgenderism. Boy am I disappointed.

Now, I may be biased, but I felt that the show did more to highlight how the lesbian community tends to not understand, misunderstand and condemn FtMs. It also made Max this angst-ridden abusive guy who not only couldn't keep his dick in his pants, but started knocking his girlfriend around after starting on T. Now, how is this good publicity again? And don't throw me any of that "any publicity is good publicity" bullshit.

The recurring theme with the whole situation was the question, "why did s/he need to role play like that?". And that bugs the heck out of me. Actually, most of riot-grrl feminism bugs the heck out of me. "Embrace your femininity!" I hear them say. "Don't let this patriarchal society tell you what you can't do!"

Well here's some news: I don't want to embrace my femininity. And I've never experienced first-hand any blatant discrimination because I'm a girl (neither was I brought up to think that only men can do certain things). I love that I have a woman's perspective on the world, and that I tend to think the way a woman does. I just don't like having boobs and curvy hips. I don't like acting in a feminine way. I'd die before I ever wear a dress or heels again. I cannot even think of ever giving birth (even though I love kids and will definitely have at least 1 child in the future). And sex just isn't as attractive when you're reminded of all of the above whenever your partner touches you.

Besides, how can you love someone fully when you can't even love yourself?

So to all you lesbians who think we're "bailing out" and trying to conform to heterosexual society, here's what I say: You tell everyone to have tolerance for each other and let you live life the way you want, and love who you fall in love with. That's pretty much all we want too.

Posted in L-Word, community, rant, personal